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i had words that were pretty.
oh, i think i wanted
to dress this up,
to make my thoughts
rich and potent.
but this isn’t a topic
that needs it,
though it enters my mind often.
now it is midday
and a nap is calling.
my eyes
are watering with tiredness,
the gentle bobbing
of my head tells me
that i should rest.
but i am here
wondering about age
about time
and the our experiences since we
last met;
about the gray hairs
you have now
and my baldness.
i wonder about wrinkles;
mine from life, from
living hard,
the trials found within.
and yours from living
just living – boring living –
age without knowledge.
you see,
your corner office
has emptied you.
the shell was there
but the existence emptied you.
the love you proclaimed
was not love,
it did not nourish you
as love would.
the hands that would’ve
held yours through every trial
are rough from age,
and now they are holding
those of another.
soon i will rest.
these thoughts come often;
usually before my naps,
when my mind and heart
are tired and
begin to wonder about age,
time, and about a life
that i once desired to embraced with you.

Published by Jeremiah Ray

Jeremiah Ray is an interdisciplinary artist and writer living and working in the coastal Maine region. He has an MFA from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago. His visual artwork is much like his life insofar as it is a constant journey of exploration and discovery. In his formative years, Jeremiah traveled extensively, exploring languages and cultures to fulfill a need for both adventure and as instruments of further understanding himself. Jeremiah completed his MFA in studio art with one intention - to teach. He desired to assist others in finding and honing their unique, personal language. He has always believed that art transcends verbal communication. Discovering one's voice in an individual medium and utilizing it to articulate nonverbally is the greatest obstacle and the most potent ability. In 2016 Jeremiah was diagnosed with advanced testicular cancer. This drastically shifted his perspective on art, visual and written, and solidified his firm belief that they are indeed a universal language. Straddled with the emotional burden of a cancer diagnosis, Jeremiah became increasingly aware that he often lacked the adequate vocabulary to understand and share his experiences fully. As such, during the most trying time in his life, he set the task of answering two core questions. First, what is vulnerability? And secondly, how do I communicate this with others? Still in recovery, Jeremiah has retained these as primary questions when beginning a project, understanding that vulnerability is intrinsic to being human and transcends language and culture.

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